Stacie Rumenap is president of Stop Child Predators, an organization that combats the sexual exploitation of children by helping parents of child victims tell their stories, law enforcement and advocates develop solutions, and decision makers find stronger and more effective policies.

The growth of the internet—including broadband and wireless access—has the unfortunate side effect of putting children at potential risk.  For the most part, the connections our kids make on social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace allow teens the opportunity to connect to other teens from around the world—something that would not have been possible just a few years ago.

But along with this new ability to “hang out online” has also come the danger of predators looking for ways to lure children into dangerous or even fatal situations.

So mom and dad, it is your job to understand who your child is talking to online and what your child is accessing.  If your household is like so many others around the country, the interest among parents to better understand what their kids are doing online will probably lead to eye-rolling, heaving sighing, and even slamming bedroom doors.  But hold your own, mom and dad—safety is not a matter of not trusting your kids, it is a matter of not trusting the person lurking on the web who may want to contact them.

Make sure your children know the dangers of talking to someone they have only met online, and remind them never to physically meet with anyone they have only become “friends” with online.  Predators share information about how best to lure children into situations that the child may believe are safe and friendly. 

You should also make certain that your operating system, anti-virus and browser software are all set to allow updates to download automatically.  Kids may go looking for websites you would not necessarily consider unsafe, like fashion or sports sites that can sometimes be manipulated to contain adult content.  But with automatic updates, your computer’s own software can serve as the first line of defense.

Remember, the internet can be accessed through devices like cell phones and gaming consuls, not just the computer.  Talk to your teens about the consequences of cyberbullying and sexting, and check their cell phone for content as well as what applications they have installed instead of waiting until the phone bill arrives to learn they have blown past their plan’s limits by sending inappropriate photos and obscene messages to their once BFF (best friend forever—time to learn teen speak…).

Text messages, as we now know, do not just disappear into the ether after they are erased on one end.  They can come back to haunt a child who sent what he or she thought was an innocent or amusing message or photo.  Studies show that kids will send electronic messages containing subject matter they would not say in person, or want their parents to read.  So if you are really concerned about who your child is talking to and what they are talking about, whether by cell phone or computer, specialized—even free—software is available that monitors the websites your child has searched, the photos and programs that have been downloaded, and even compiles instant messages or IMs that have been sent and received.  This may be overkill for some, but if you have any reason to suspect someone is attempting to reach your child, this type of software may serve as a good resource.

After all, the effects of cyberbullying and sexting can be serious.  Victims can become withdrawn, avoid friends and want to skip school altogether.  In extreme cases, victims become depressed and may even consider or attempt suicide. 

We owe it to our kids to teach them online safety, and it is just as important for parents to learn the risks of the Internet in order to help their family have a safe and secure online experience.